AB Used Cars

5m/either, 2w
2m 55-75, 1m 40s, 2m 25-40; 1w 80, 1w 40s

ABC Used Cars has lost the "C" from its "ABC" sign, and the lot is in pretty sad shape. Its main asset is a back lot full of decrepit vintage cars. On the same day, two sets of customers come: a man, accompanied by a rival used car lot owner, secretly searching for the 1956 Norseman Concept Car that supposedly was lost in the sinking of the Andrea Doria; and a TV crew from a car renovation show. When the cars they are most interested in show up on an inventory list, but not on the lot, hijinks ensue.

Aside from the two used car lot owners, a mechanic, the host of the TV show and his assistant, and the man in search of the Norseman, we have a doddering old woman, the widow of the original owner of the lot, who holds the secret of where those two cars are. Two figures also appear in darkness in one scene, but in a dimly lit fashion that would easily allow these silent roles to be filled by stage hands.

AB Used Cars requires a unit set with four doors, portraying the sales room of the used car lot. No unusual props are required, but lighting effects are needed for two nighttime scenes, and sound effects are needed to establish offstage activities to which the onstage characters react.

While the majority of the cast is written as male, all the roles can be filled by women, with just pronoun changes needed. Gender-neutral character names are used for all the male characters.

AB Used Cars can be produced in as simple or embellished a fashion as appropriate for the venue. Its automotive content is secondary to the mystery/caper plot, and the comedy is capped with a heart-warming ending.